The first thing I want to say, without a doubt, is that it’s hard to find a job today. Expecting hiring managers to get back to you is like waiting for a package to arrive from an order that never went through. Maybe I’m overreacting here, and perhaps I’m lucky that among the many rejections I’ve received, at least I did receive them.
The frustration is that, as a 29-year-old person with a successful career, a desire to be challenged and valued, empathy and willingness to show up, and flexibility to change my environment—I was shaken by the lack of value, empathy, presence, and overall respect from companies all over the world.
A few weeks ago, I was burnt out. I looked at the application forms (ever so similar to everything else) and wanted to cry. I started running and doing marathon prep because it kept me going while being in total control. I was still scheduling a few job interviews but without any desire to follow through with them. Overall, I was wasting my time and everyone else’s.
However, from every 50 job applications, about three were following up, and about ten were actually responding within the next few days. It’s funny how I’m still receiving emails from applications that were sent out three months ago.
Eventually, I started to share my experience with my friends and network and received a lot of proactive insights and support. I will share with you a few of the most significant moments, why they mattered to me, and how they changed my mindset.
Word of Mouth
Among the many voices I heard from in the past few weeks, a couple that stood out were from friends in the tech startup world, who emphasized the importance of trusting my personal network to get the right leads. For those reading this article who are in similar situations, this means that a lot of opportunities with good (even great) companies never reach the job board websites you might be looking into. Because many startups haven’t completely grown into the typical corporate model—with many recruiters, HR, and even agencies—the small teams that make up a startup are usually like-minded people who actively participate in communities related to entrepreneurship and tech. They source their needs in private chats or through their personal LinkedIn profiles to get referrals and leads.
It’s Harder for Them to Find You
One of my most recent, perspective-changing conversations was with a friend I hadn’t seen in a while. During our lunch check-in, he asked me what were the main sources of my frustration in finding a job. I mentioned:
- Generalized job application processes
- How cover letters and going the extra mile to speak with recruiters were extremely time-consuming based on the reply rates
- The reality of job interviews, which felt like a cloning pitch where I was trying to sell myself and show interest in the company without knowing if I even resonated with their team culture
To his surprise (and mine), he had a different perspective. He shared honestly that the problem seemed to be my mindset, not the job market. Why? Because in his experience, executives and recruiters are the ones who struggle to find the right fit for their company.
Remember, the people you’re speaking with at job interviews know very well what their company culture is, the vision, and the roadmap. Of course, they want to know your background, your passion for the role, and that you are curious about what they do. But more often than not, they don’t know how to ask the right questions to determine if you are a fit for the role, and they are also frustrated by the number of applicants and interviews.
Just as you don’t want to spend your whole week in job interviews for different companies, they also don’t want to get to know hundreds of applicants. So where’s the sweet spot? In changing your mindset!
Instead of coming across as just another seller of your own background and experience, shift their interest by letting them know:
- Who you truly are
- What are your negotiables and non-negotiables
- What you are looking for in your next career path
And don’t be shy to ask questions at the beginning of the interview, such as:
- Their role and history with the company
- What it’s like to work there
- What would be their ideal candidate
By taking these steps, you can relax and let go of that pitch you’ve so well memorized by now. Moreover, you get to control the outcome and stop wasting time. Imagine that the recruiter answers your questions and lets you know that they are looking for someone who can do multiple roles at once, or that they want someone to fit into a position that has no opportunities to grow within the company. Maybe that’s not what you’re looking for or doesn’t fit their salary proposition. Now, you’re in a sweet spot: you can choose to let them go with respect or negotiate better conditions.
Question Your Ideals
Another set of experiences that really helped me get out of this rabbit hole came from the number of questions my friends asked during our conversations. For example, when explaining to them what my past experiences looked like, I was asked about how I felt during those times and why I was choosing to stay in the same career path as before. My obvious reply was something like, “Because I know that I’m good at it.” However, my past successes don’t have to be a reflection of my current needs, and just because I thought that my experience in the past was a constraint to the roles I could apply to, this was a limiting belief.
Obviously, nobody will tell you that you can shift from a salesperson to an engineer without any academic or professional experience in it. While the extremes don’t match, there’s always a spectrum of positions that fall in similar categories—and if you really see yourself fitting into a different role, then there are ways to gain and show that you have that knowledge.
For example, my main professional experience can be categorized as business and sales, customer service, marketing, and project management. However, I have also dedicated my past years to studying and earning certificates in areas such as web and mobile development, product management, and full-stack development. Although my studies aren’t as impactful as my professional experience for the typical recruiter, that doesn’t mean that I cannot stand out through a well-written cover letter, a portfolio showcasing my techy side projects, and so on. In other words, if my desire is to shift into a technical role, I have to first believe that I am good enough for them!
Another question that challenged my beliefs was, “What do you see yourself doing for a long time?” Because I am a person of multiple virtues, this question came almost as an attack to me. Honestly, I could see myself living very different lives. Here’s a list of portraits that I could fit:
- In one life, I am a book author: I travel, read a lot, and write beautiful books with rich stories, ghostwrite books about people in my life that I find inspiring, and help others through practical insights on shifting their mindsets.
- In another life, I am a geeky tech woman: I spend my time coding on a black screen, participate in hackathons just for the fun of it, and develop amazing and innovative products. Think “12 Startups in 12 Months” by Peter Levels.
- I could become a true advocate for a better world: Write and implement projects that leverage my experience with NGOs, collaborate and consult with organizations, and bring to life the mission and vision of many worldwide organizations tackling social inclusion, sustainability, justice, and respect. I believe that while I have the right to our ambition to climb the ladder, I should also embrace the opportunity to make the world a better place.
- I could get on the startup founder path once again: Work more hours than a day has and strive to make an idea into reality.
- Or be a content creator and freelancer: Travel as a digital nomad through countries where the lifestyle is more affordable, and live between hustling and relaxing.
- I could also be realistic: Take on a full-time job, maybe hybrid or on-site, have the office lifestyle, build roots in a cozy home with my partner, and save money for my future.
If you can dream it, you can live in the idea that one day you will be it. So, how could I answer a question that dictated one path? That leads us to the next section.
Practice Essentialism: Find Your Passion!
In the meantime, I started reading Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown. The book title is quite self-explanatory, and for me, it came in two perspectives. The first is that I considered myself an essentialist in many ways, such as through my ability to set personal boundaries and stick to them, to say ‘no,’ and to keep practicing simplicity by consuming less and allowing dedicated solitude for my personal growth. Another side of the picture came in acknowledging that in the areas of my life that frustrated me the most—like finding a new job—I was terrible at essentialism.
I accounted for the quantity of job applications and interviews I had for roles and companies that I cared little for, the gigantic list of projects and ideas I had—some to which I dedicated hours, only to find out that I didn’t have enough time for them—and the lack of self-respect and care I was giving myself when following through with opportunities simply for the sake of having many instead of the right ones.
This led me to take a dedicated reflection weekend and sort out a list of:
- What were my ideal options (those many lives I could live)
- What were the most essential factors for me (health, financial guarantees, feeling valued, inspiring others, and building a family)
- What was in my hands RIGHT NOW (what opportunities and projects I had on the table)
- What makes me feel alive
- When envisioning my options and essential factors—what’s making me contract right now? And what makes me feel expanded?
Believe it or not, based on this, I was able to clearly see that there weren’t as many options in my life as I thought before. As a tip, I also used ChatGPT with the prompt “You are a life coach” to help me ask the right questions, organize the options that were more aligned to my values, and to fully prepare to grieve and let go of those lists that were only frustrating me.
Collaborations, Freelance, and Passion Projects
Finally, and in complete alignment with everything else, I started thinking more about these amazing people around me who helped me shift mindsets. They inspired me to pursue a life that felt real, to stand up for myself, and to realize that I am the only differentiator from other candidates.
Of course, the picture now looks pretty; however, these months of frustration weren’t solved in a day, and financial stability was still one of the main elements of my frustration. I felt lucky to be able to step away from the problem and find a new approach, and that also granted me a lot more time each day to focus on qualitative results (such as applying to roles that I actually want and networking), which leads me to the last big question: “What can I do now to earn money?”
While that answer didn’t come quickly, and even after asking AI, friends, and listening to podcasts about it, the possibilities seemed too time-consuming or uncertain.
Here’s what I did:
- Wrote a list of skills and experiences that I could offer
- Wrote a list of people around me, what they were doing, and how much I resonated with them
- Reflected on ways that I used to make money before, like freelancing on Fiverr, and so on
Based on that, I dedicated a few hours per week to improve my freelance profile and share it with my network, and spoke with a few friends who were doing consulting for clients or worked at agencies. This allowed me to receive a few offers; the first was making a website, then writing a few articles for a website, and so on.
Caution that this may not help you guarantee a financial outcome to sustain a family or even yourself fully—it didn’t do it for me just yet! However, knowing where I want to be and seeking it, while also finding some reward that my financial needs are being partially met due to my own effort, already brings a lot of relief and motivation.
So, What Can You Do?
In conclusion to my three-month journey in the job market, the burnout, and breakthrough, I decided to write this article in hopes that it can resonate and help you on your journey. If you didn’t feel like reading the whole text, which is fair too, check out the summary below.
My Takeaways on the Current Job Market:
- There’s a Lack of Authenticity: Companies are using a cloning strategy to post, apply, and interview for roles, making the process feel impersonal and mechanical.
- Delayed Responses: Communication is often slow, with some companies responding months after applications were submitted.
- Quantity Over Quality: Both applicants and companies seem to focus on numbers rather than meaningful connections.
- Hidden Opportunities: Many great opportunities are not advertised publicly and can be found through personal networks and word of mouth.
- Mindset is Key: Shifting your mindset can change your approach and experience in the job search.
Questions, Reflections, and Strategies That You Can Implement:
- Assess Your Mindset: Are you approaching the job search with frustration or openness?
- Leverage Your Network: Tap into your personal connections for leads that aren’t publicly advertised.
- Be Authentic: Present who you truly are, including your negotiables and non-negotiables.
- Ask Insightful Questions: Engage interviewers by asking about their experience and the company culture.
- Reevaluate Your Path: Consider if your current career path aligns with your passions and values.
- Practice Essentialism: Focus on what’s truly important to you and let go of unnecessary pursuits.
- Explore New Avenues: Don’t hesitate to consider freelancing, collaborations, or passion projects as interim solutions.
Real Actions to Take:
- Create a List of Skills: Write down all the skills and experiences you can offer.
- Map Your Network: Identify people in your circle who might connect you to opportunities.
- Customize Applications: Apply only to roles that genuinely interest you, focusing on quality over quantity.
- Prepare Thoughtful Questions: Develop questions to ask during interviews to better understand the company and role.
- Invest in Personal Growth: Read books like Essentialism to refine your approach.
- Utilize Tools: Use resources like ChatGPT to help clarify your goals and strategies.
- Prioritize Self-Care: Take care of your well-being to maintain motivation during the job search.
Finally, trust yourself, and feel free to reach out to me on LinkedIn or Instagram to share your experience, feedback, or just to connect! 🙂
